Once upon a time, I was a competitive ballroom dancer. Dancing taught me a lot about the relationships between connection and balance.

There’s this thing called “Sway”

In ballroom partnership, the lady is looking to achieve a shape using the top part of her torso and arms much like a table top. This type of shape is produced by sway. It’s the result of alignment to your partner with respect to angling the lady’s torso slightly right and extending up and out to the left side.

When you sway, your partner can get past you more easily. This is true for the phrase, “go with the flow”. Sometimes it’s easier not to fight your way through life. Just, sway and let things go by without struggling against them.

Connection to your partner

Through giving and receiving lessons in ballroom dance, I heard a lot of ladies asking about how to react to the man’s lead, “how do I know he’s going to do that step?” or “how will I know what to do when he does X?”

Here’ the trick ladies: stop thinking about you.

Instead, be ready to receive the man’s lead. Whatever that is. Some men are poor leaders…so try not to partner with them 😉

For ladies, as the follower in partnership dancing, maintain a good frame, keep your right side connected and shift your weight evenly from foot to food.

Achieving a graceful look comes from personal balance

I was always working on this, especially in heels. Good balance comes from engaging your core stomach muscles to hold you up, stop your momentum and lengthen your spine (without lifting one’s shoulders). Gracefulness does not rely on someone else holding you up – even though that’s the illusion created by the partnership.

I think this is true in life; people gravitate towards independent, graceful, charming and resourceful individuals. There’s nothing scarier than having to take care of someone else when you have no clue how to do it for yourself.

One can never have enough glitter

Apart from good posture, this is my favorite takeaway because it means something to everyone. When you see someone dressed with care, it shows. The human eye is attracted to “shiny” objects; a bright smile, a clean and fresh face, a crisp outfit.

It may not be physical glitter, but one can never wear enough of the clothes, jewelry and accessories that light you up as an individual.