Life hack: on being brief and brilliant

So, I received a violation notice from the Toll Road Department the other day for apparently not having paid a $0.75 fee.  I responded online with the following dispute:

To Whom It May Concern:

Upon exiting the north bound toll road, I paid $O.75 at the off-ramp booth. I proceeded to turn around  and re-enter the toll road heading south, my original intent, and was required to pay an additional $0.75 to enter the toll road. In both cases I provided three (3) quarters, exact change, the requested toll amount. I did not proceed until the green light indicated acceptance of the paid fees.

Having paid in both instances, I would appreciate a review of the footage of the day/time in which my vehicle passed through the booths whereupon I paid both tolls.

I will happily provide a $0.75 check to the Department since, for whatever reason, one of the toll payments was not recorded. However, I did not intentionally refute payment upon neither exiting nor entering the toll road. Moreover, I happened to be traveling on another part of the toll road later that morning and dutifully paid $4.00 for traveling on that road. Accordingly, when I travel on the toll roads, I am aware and prepared to fulfill such fees at that time.

Thank you for your time and I look forward to the Department’s response to my dispute.
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Suffice it to say, this was too loquacious. The lesson here is if you wan someone to take notice, brevity is best.

A note in red appeared on the screen: “Explanation is too long.”  I had to laugh at myself and my lengthy explanation–amazing though it was.  Of course I cut it down, all the while thinking I’d basically just condensed it down into a Tweet.

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